What I know about Paul Byrd

Don’t worry, Paul. You got away with it.

1. He’s 37 years old.
2. His teammates call him “Frasier” because he looks like Kelsey Grammer.
3. He was on the 1999 National League All Star team.
4. He’s an author.
5. He used to love pornography but now he loves Jesus.*
6. He claimed he took HGH as treatment for a tumor on his pituitary gland but it was later revealed he started using HGH before the tumor and it was prescribed by a dentist from Florida who got his dental license suspended for incompetence. He also lied about working with MLB on this subject.
7. He was one of the players listed in the Mitchell Report (based on the story of his HGH use coming out).
8. He has a 7-10 record this year with 30 strikeouts in his last 60 innings – and 31 earned runs in those same innings.
9. He’s going to buy Kevin Cash a “couple pairs” of boots or “maybe a watch” for giving up number 36 (Byrd’s preferred number).
10. He’s the starting pitcher for the Red Sox tonight.

So I now have to suck it up and watch this lying, cheating guy play for my team and hope he does well. And this pisses me off to no end.

But, for now, suck it up I will because I want the Sox to win the damn games. I’ll bite my tongue bloody when they talk about what a good guy he is and what an asset he is to the team. I will, because I’m supposed to root for the laundry, right?

Something, as many of you know, I don’t always do blindly. There are many who used to wear the laundry who I still root for. But, I suppose, if I could root for Brendan Donnelly and Eric Gagne last year, I can stifle it for a while and hope that Byrd’s stay in Boston works out as well as theirs did (for the team, anyway).

*I’m Catholic. I love Jesus too. Just for the record. I’m not mocking that. I just don’t think you need to forgo one for the other to be considered a good person. I’d rather you enjoy pornography than cheat or lie.